Tuesday, September 3, 2013


Whatever I do, I must not expect too high or too far. Anything can happen. So, by not expecting at all, I won't be disappointed.

Monday, September 2, 2013


Last night, I was stressed out from your comment on how I should initiate more instead of him doing everything.
I am originally a very shy person. It is hard for me to start a conversation nonetheless, continue one.
Even using a social media, it is tough.
But for him, I guess I will try harder.
And last night, due to the stress, I dreamed that we broke up. I was like 'what' when I woke up. Can't really remember any of it.
Refuse to.

Sunday, September 1, 2013


It is not easy to get used to something new. I'm already hating myself. Now, I have t learn how to love someone else. Have to work hard on that.
Every single mistake that I make, makes me think that it might disappoint him.
Every words that I said, makes me think that he might hate me for it.
I have to think before I act, before I speak.
I am so scared of everything and there is no one else to help me but myself.
I need to buckle myself up for this.
I don't want to give up.
But i am afraid of losing him.
Being too cautious is really giving me a headache.
Apparently, holding a conversation with him is the key to the relationship, yet that is the hardest thing for me.
Need to learn more on how to talk.
I really hope this will go away.
Please go away, stupid insecure feelings.