If I were to turn back time.

I would turn back to the day when I was born and kill myself with my own hands.

Losing a friend.

If losing a friend will cause me to lose 10 more friends, fine then. I don't even care. I faced this once, I can do it again. Why not spread it more? Post in some social network and spread the word that I am a bitch and if you are a friend of hers, you are not a friend of mine. Here, I helped you a little already. If you think i am talking about you, yes I am talking about you. You want to end this friendship, fine with me. I am tired of your fucking bossy attitude and that stupid bossy tone and self centered nature. Oh, well no use telling you again and again. Because in your head, everyone else is wrong, only you are right. You want me to shout or scream at you? No. Apparently, I have to repeat this again and again. Just because you shout and scream and talk with that stupid tone of yours, doesn't mean everyone is the same as you. I won't scream or shout at you because I AM NOT YOU.  I do whatever fuck I want when I'm angry. No need for you to control whatever I do. I am not your puppet.
If this will cause me to be the loneliest person in the whole world, I don't mind. I have been there, I have experienced it.

p/s: Oh, cry as much as you want. Get all that sympathy from all the people around you. That will do the job faster anyone. Make my friends hate me. Make everyone hate me. 

Who?

Who am I suppose to rely on anymore?
Who am I suppose to believe anymore?
Who am I suppose to trust anymore?
I somehow seems to begin doubting everyone. It is the worst thing a friend can ever do. But i can't stop doubting. Everything don't fall into place. Something always seem to be wrong. It's like the friend I thought I can rely on is stabbing me on the back happily. Going lalala and shit..
So, now, I am just so very tired. I don't want to start worrying on pointless things. Can I just stop thinking about them please? I really hope he/she can please tell me what did I do wrong. I don't want to be so ignore everything til I became a selfish bitch. Anyone can you please help me? I really need you to tell it to my face, not behind me.
I know I am a very shy person, finding for new friends is like waiting to snow in Malaysia. I have only this small group of friends that I could have fun with. I don't have anyone else. The ones in Muar are most probably gone and lost in contact. I am so so so so so sad because once my best friend, now just an acquaintance.
Are you giving my hopes up or I am just bringing my own hopes up? All the tweets that you send, words that you say, is it just me or is it real? What does it mean? I don't want to be left hanging like this. Just say ' you are wrong, it is not for you'. There, problem solved. The facebook statuses from other people seem to be hurting me a lot. I am probably thinking too much. I mean it's probably not for me. It's probably for someone else, but coincidence is so weird in this situation. I never believe in coincidences. SOMEONE TELL ME PLEASE!! I BEG OFF YOU!!